Just the Two of Us - Traveling with Anima

 This month at Circolo delle Mamme Viaggiatrici we decided to ponder and discuss what works best for us at 'vacation time': together with other children and families or concentrating on keeping it intimate - just the family nucleus.

For me it was an easy dialogue since I have only ever vacationed with my children alone.


As a single mom used to doing things 'on my own', I have always vacationed without husbands or significant other - just with the kids.  We haven't had the experience of inviting anyone to go with us or entertained going with anyone else.  The responsibility of making someone else's child happy for longer than a few hours is daunting for me and so I don't do it.

I do admire the variations that parents come up with to make vacationing with kids more comfortable and easy going.   I have friends who always travel in a 'pack' with their kids.  Of course, families with more than two kids already are a pack unto themselves, with rituals all their own which I find fascinating.  Usually each child gets to invite a friend on outings so that each one has a playmate to occupy them.  Fantastic idea. All the parent has to do is 'manage' the outing.  Applied to vacation time, it would be much the same as going to the Mall or roller skating or afternoon cooking school but more hours. I like it - but the thought of doing nothing but managing activity time slots, like a school teacher or benign traffic cop is not fun for me.

In America, there really isn't a lot of 'time' in vacation time anyway so we are talking about a few precious days here and there. In Italy, where Ferragosto means two whole weeks to spend together it takes on a whole different meaning.

The other day I met an American woman who has lived in Italy many years and has a daughter Ani's age. She told me that in Italy it is normal for the kids to be invited  on vacation with another family for a period of time, where you kind of give your kid away for a couple of weeks. Often of course it is also with grandparents or close friends, sometimes it is with families of school friends.  This year will be that girl's first experience staying away from her mom.  Although the American mother already said yes to two vacations for her daughter, she is a bit unsure how she really feels about it all. I expressed that I would be a little apprehensive, especially since my Girl is only eleven, even though it is culturally acceptable. I'll cross that bridge if and when we get there. 


 For now, I am a happily convinced 'vacation with your children on your own' mom. Yes, there are times where my children have bemoaned the lack of a 'partner in crime' so they are not bored.

 The point of my taking the time off to go on vacation is to be get to know one another better in an atmosphere that is not filled with daily routine. With the realization of how precious time is, it has been my choice to concentrate more on intimacy and the possibility of weaving together special moments to remember. Those lumps of boredom, when they come up, are a perfect way to see how kids deal with the unfortunate but very real fact that life is not always Disneyland.  Just figuring out  how to be still and listening to the heart movements of the world around you is also valid . Today, with the stress of working long hours and an ever frenetic lifestyle, even in the land of 'la dolce vita' - the pleasure of being present with my children outweighs the 'freedom' traveling in a group or with an additional child offers. Let's see what living in Italy will teach us about vacationing 'solo' in the future.  


To see how the other Circle moms spend their vacation time with their bebe's be sure to click through to visit Alessandra at Lali Viaggi, Valentina at Family Company and the effervescent Silvia with her Tripando blog post as soon as you can! Here's to a fantastic vacation!

From Blue Bear to Tuscany - Traveling with Anima

                                             

My daughter has lived in one city her whole life.  Denver,  sometimes called the Queen City of the West is where she feels comfortable. The city famously has 300 days of sunshine a year, majestic mountains, countless outdoor activities including hiking, biking, skiing and notable sports teams. The nature of it's placement makes it immeasurably attractive, especially for upwardly mobile families raising children.

Blue Bear looking at Blue Bear

Up to a few years ago it was  still referred to as a sort of hinterland as far as 'real' cities go. Fortunately (or not) it's residents have seen an influx of people who stream in everyday in the hope that they too will become Denverites and live the life of sunny sports 365 a year.   Denver's life style has gotten a good polish in the last few years and superficially, the sheen of hokeyness that might have hovered over the city in previous years has been replaced by a burgeoning theater, art and restaurant scene not to mention top events, national press and enthusiastic game changers, none of whose names I can now, unfortunately remember. But believe me when I tell you Denver is great.

Skate Girl

The family loved living in Denver.  I think I understand why. Denver is homey. Comfortable. It is manageable and still it gets gets a thumbs up for coolness as far as cities go. It's the reason we remained many years longer even when I personally felt it was time to move on.

Love Dog

My kids developed into lovely and down to earth people - which I think has a lot also to do with the good energy of the city they live in.

Denver from Sloan's Lake

Lots of  things to do in Denver with kids although for the most part they are the same things you do in any decent sized city: The Aquarium, Zoo, Children's Museum, Natural History Museum, Rocky's Baseball and of course the skiing in the mountains, which is not something that every decent sized city has. There are loads of parks in the city, outfitted with play areas, soccer and baseball fields and plenty of concerts, festivals and events that kids can engage in with their parents. A parent can go as near and deep as he/she wants to - the energy level is up to them - the city infrastructure is all set and the natural resources are all there.

Lakeside Amusement Park

From this very organized and perfect set up we have recently moved on to an equally wonderful but completely different, Tuscan landscape.

Gazing at Chianciano

S. Biaggio 

Montepulciano

 Castle @Montalcino

Last month, Ani and I came to a small village in the southern part of Tuscany to stay.  The beauty of the village and it's surroundings is every bit as stunning as the Rocky Mountains. Grounded in history, agriculture, power and art, the area has developed into a heaven for vacation seekers and food and wine connoisseurs.

As much as I am personally charmed, I have come to realize that many or maybe all of the things I cherish about being here are relatively unimportant to kids, for instance -  my daughter.  Children love to run, play, eat, laugh and make friends and are best when they feel safe to be themselves. Bagno Vignoni and Denver are diametrically opposed in life styles but in both cities we have found that the real fun is in relationship and in interacting with nature.

The small village of Bagno Vignoni has roughly 100 inhabitants but thousands of tourists annually.

They come for the history and to relax at the thermal pools. It's been a destination since well before the Romans, who apparently made it a regular stop on pilgrimages.  It is famous for a Piazza filled with water that a saintly woman supposedly bathed in.

At the Bagno Vignoni vasca

Field Trip for School Children

 Every day there are tour buses that cruise through for an hour or so to glimpse the famous square and the Parco dei Mulini, (recently restored) that are the ruins of innovative wind mills used in medieval times for grinding grain. School kids too come to enjoy the scenery and especially enjoy putting their feet into the thermal water that runs down the gorello over the cliff  to the ruins below.

Practically every mile along the road to and from Bagno Vignoni there is some wondrous  landscape or historical house - Charles Dickens apparently slept in a now abandoned stone house not a mile from us on the via Cassia, the ancient road that leads to Rome.

The Girl & an 8th Cent Lion @ San Quirico

Cheering on the Mille Miglia San Quirico d'Orcia

One of the many Ferrarri's @the Mille Miglia

 I list the amazing history of art and culture surrounding us whenever we are driving to and fro for a loaf of bread or to spend an afternoon looking at Etruscan sites near Chiusi. In my heart I believe Ani is absorbing it all and storing it in that memory bubble we all draw on later in later years. For now it is tentative, but she is giving it her all, taking pictures for the blog and trying to learn enough Italian to negotiate a conversation with the local kids.

Near Chiusi

At the Stables @Castiglione

What she really enjoys is putting her feet in the hot water, exploring the paths around the pools and eating delicious food like a real Italian. She has become the latest convert to homemade Pici and fresh mozarella.

A plate of Pici (ricettariocucina.com)

The most difficult thing since the move has been homesickness. The house we are staying in is a safe haven and has been paramount in easing the longing for loved ones.

Home

There are fields all around and dogs and cats and birds and flowers. The constant contact with nature has done miracles for a beautiful bird heart that misses the big city but most of all the hugs of her grandmother and big brother.

Best Friends in Colorado

Since our arrival in our new home, we have found that the birds and the bees and the company of a good dog usually brings everything in perspective.

Finding the Path with Shep

Fetching Stones w Shep

Shep the Plate Holder

Till next time, Traveling with Anima wishes you the best from the Tuscan countryside.  Our Traveling Mom friends, Alex, Valentina, Monica, Silvia and Melissa are all talking about their home towns today too, so please click on the links and read their suggestions on where to go and what to see with your babes when you are in Milano, San Francisco, Marostica, Naples and Pisa!!

Walking Works it Out

The Circolo delle Mamme Viaggiatrici, a group of Italian bloggers that I partner with, write mostly on subjects related to travel and children on their individual blogs. Once a month we take a particular theme and collectively write about it. Today, I am thrilled to share the second post for the traveling moms group with 'walking' as a theme.

                                                              Walking Works it Out

Taking example from my grandparents who lived to be in their 90's, I know that walking is one of the simplest and healthful activities that a person of any age can do to keep their body, mind and spirit alive.  My grandmother and grandfather walked miles every single day of their lives. They both attributed their longevity to moderation in all things and breathing fresh country air on their brisk daily walks in the foothills of the Alps.


Americans don't walk. It is no exaggeration to say this and you can look anywhere around you and see that there is not a soul on the streets. The exception are the health conscious or people from other countries that haven't gotten spoiled by driving the car to any and every destination. Yet. Those are also the people I see walking with their  families on Sunday afternoons or after early dinner in the evenings around our lake. Otherwise, in America I think the only walkers are  in the big cities like New York and San Francisco where there are concentrated residential areas in downtown spaces.

In my life though I have found the pleasure in walking and the need to do so on a daily basis. Especially with  big changes going on in our lives like the impending trip to Italy for the summer, we all are particularly energetic.  The Queen, is relocating from the Lake house to be closer to family elsewhere which also brings up a lot of emotions in all of us. I find that we swing between feelings of upheaval and chaos, adventure and excitement and on occasion, nerve racking fear of the unknown. Of course, because we do what we must, we press on.. Emotions can run high. The psyche can play tricks.

To alleviate some of the nervous energy that builds up I take walks as often as I can. I try to go every
day in the morning or afternoon. If the Girl is home she comes with me on her skate board or her bike. Together, it makes the three miles around the lake road go by fast and more fun. Usually very few people are out which makes it almost like having our own private park.

 When I am by myself I tend to be contemplative and talk to myself, trying to work through problems or ideas. I get a great mental workout when I walk. I think it's kind of a chain reaction that happens. Moving your body and getting the muscles working and at the same time absorbing stimulation from nature: bird calls, earth smells,  the blowing wind and so on.  The brain is working on a completely different pattern than if you are breathing artificial gym air, stuffy office or school ventilation. Creative ideas spring up when I walk. Solutions to daily problems present themselves and in the meantime I have become much more aware of my posture and breathing. Walking with the kids is an altogether different experience than walking alone.

 When my very loving but quiet son was a teen, he would on occasion consent to a walk around the lake with me. Sometimes by the end of the hour we would have cobbled together a bond of sorts sifted from conversation about random, seemingly insignificant things like the neighborhood or the weather. It was not obvious, but the act of walking, moving forward, most importantly the physical act of being around nature in the middle of the city was in itself a very moving experience. I like to think that those walks had some sort of effect on him.

In the end, with so much going on in everyone's lives there has to be a time and place to just practice being free from the anchors of the machine, the computer, the car, oven, chair, television or any other thing that binds us to the daily routine of an immobile and stuffy life. I say this as a person who is absolutely not interested in any sort of sport, much less the competitive kind and so my meaning might not be obvious.  Here in America we are addicted to the sedentary life. Through my own experiences and together with my son and daughter, I feel that if we walked more people here would all be happier.

We are.

Because I learned the importance of being in Nature from my grandmother who made walking a basic tenant of her life, much like her religion, I don't question it's positive role in my mental and physical health. I know it. And knowing this allows me to set an example for my children, who although not as fond of walking as I am, will hopefully follow me eventually. As a matter of fact, the Girl will soon get to experience walking culture, as we are in Europe traveling and much of the time we will be walking. In Europe, where it is still normal, the simple act of walking is equal to the simple act of living. If you can, you should.

This is the second post that is dedicated to the "Traveling with Anima" page that I started last month. At the same time it is the second post written in conjunction with my Italian blogging partners Monica, Valentina, Silvia, Alessandra and Melissa - who writes in English and in Italian. Together we make up Il Circolo delle Mamme Viaggiatrici - or the Traveling Moms Club. Silvia, Monica, Alessandra and Valentina's children are all under the age 7. Melissa and I have children that are a bit older. All of us have had the travel blood since birth, it seems and have continued to travel with our children. Each one of us has a particular worldview that we wish to share with whoever is interested in travel and kids. I suggest you visit the other women's blogs to see what they say about the Art of Walking.